So I’m a freshman at a four year university at the moment, I am over 2000 miles away from home. My first semester is coming to a close and I am going to fail every one of my classes, Ds at best if I work my *** off in the next week.
I’m been lazy all semester. I’ve barely gone to class or done any work since September. So it’s no surprise I’m failing. But, I don’t want to be here all that much in the first place. What I’d love to do instead is get certified as a personal trainer (in the process) and begin training people to live healthier lifestyles and to reach their goals. I am extremely motivated when it comes to lifting and nutrition, I love it. Maybe while I do this I could take a few courses per semester at a local community college for cheap and work my way toward a degree, and eventually open up my own facility. That’d be the dream, at least.
The thing is, my entire family is dead set on the idea that I HAVE to stay in school and obtain a degree in four years. I’d be the first of my immediate family to do so. My parents have no idea that I’m failing, they do know that I am having a hard time at school though. I wouldn’t feel as guilty about being a lazy jerk if my parents didn’t decide to take out loans to keep me here (there was a mistake and my tuition scholarship was taken away after the first few weeks of school, I should’ve gone home then but my parents wouldn’t allow it). I already feel like the worst son in the world because they’ve done so much for me to be here, yet I messed it up.
If I stay, I’d be on academic probation next semester and would have to keep a 2.0+ GPA. Which, let’s be honest, is pretty damn simple. But I’d also have to find a way to explain to my parents why I’m flunking everything right now.
If I leave, I have to decide if I want to withdraw from the university before the deadline of next Friday (I fly home eight days after that), make sure I get my work for a group project I’m part of done (I’d feel terrible if I left my group hanging). and still explain to my parents what the hell happened. lol
I’m not really sure what to do right now. I wouldn’t be so worried if I had a job and money to rent an apartment and sustain myself. My parents are liable to kick me out if our conversation about this goes badly. I’m also afraid of letting them down even more than I already have in my life.
Does anybody have any insight on what i should do in this situation? Any tips on how to handle my parents would be greatly appreciated as well. Thanks in advance.
P.S. I know how stupid I was for putting myself in this situation, and I know that I am the only one to blame for it. I accept that and plan to redeem myself in the present and future.